Places and things I want to do.

I guess you could say this is my bucket list. But I am not much of a fan of that term.  So this is the list of places and things I want to do, preferably while I am young and my knees are still with me.  

They are in no particular order...

1. Fly to Victoria and rent a car and then take the ferry to Port Angeles. Have dinner where Bella and Edward had dinner. Drive to Forks and do a Twilight Tour.
2. Take the train along the Oregon coast up thru the California coast.
3. Get tattoos. I have 3 already planned.
4. Go to England. Tour Buckingham Palace. Eat fish and chips. Drive to small towns. Take the Hogwarts Express.
5. Go to Newfoundland and see Great Big Sea in concert at their motherland.
6. Go on a Mediterranean cruise.
7. Renew my vows with my lobster, Andrew (have my parents and siblings there)
8. Visit Santa Barbara - I used to watch that soap opera,  I want to see the houses.
9. Find an Alpaca Farm and pet the Alpaca's. 
10. Snorkel in Australia along the Great Barrier Reef.
11. Vacation in Hawaii.
12. Get on that ridiculously priced Rocky train with the glass roofs that goes thru the mountains.

I think that is mostly it.  I mean there might be more, but this is pretty good right now.

Hey Nonny Ding Dong...

Last week was fun. Really fun.

Tuesday May 15th, 2012 was the day my episode of Canada Sings aired.  WestJet vs. OPP.  

The excitement that lead up to that day was amazing. I had so many co-workers and friends stop by all day on the Monday, telling me they were excited for the episode. On the flip side, there were folks asking me "When does it air?". It was great to say 'Tomorrow!".  

Tuesday finally arrived (It took its time).   The big reveal of who won that night would give me so much relief! 

WestJet as usual, was phenomenal.  With the assistance of "Cabin Pressure" and the CARE team, we set up a cocktail area with tables filled with snacks. There was licorice, chips, pretzels, jube jubes, and jelly beans. We were popping popcorn and there was a cooler filled with pop.  There was wine for purchase as well for the sophisticated.  

Prior to the show beginning, everyone was seated in the big rooms with the large projector screens, one by one, members of Cabin Pressure were introduced. We walked a red carpet with paparazzi taking our pictures, we were received with a quick bio we had provided. I had intended to make the audience laugh. I was successful! Then we sat down with all the viewers we had invited, and co-workers who had joined.  

My excitement and nerves were running wild as I watched the Canada Sings logo and theme song on the screen.  It opened with our story, and as Jennie and Jesse told their tales of how their children have the lives they have today because of the Alberta Children's Hospital, I had to get a box of Kleenex.  I noticed I wasn't the only one bawling.  I handed out tissues to those around me.    When it was time to see our actual performance, I could barely breathe.  Dan started singing, and I started swooning. I watched in awe as our colours and voices swirled about the stage. It was so very weird when I heard my voice, was that really me? Yup. (I just changed the title of this blog from "Five minutes is better than none" to "Hey Nonny Ding Dong"). Seeing the judges reactions was awesome. Then, it was over!

Commercial break: the crowd gathered at WestJet is cheering so loud. I am overcome with emotions.

Next up, the OPP: Project Glee.  I am crying again. Now that I know these people, to see them cry, makes me cry.  Plus, I know what is coming now, and I get new tissues.  As I hear Celeste say that if they lose, they will all feel like they failed. This breaks my heart. I feel like a jerk. These are good people doing this for a good cause, and their loss makes them feel like they failed.

The show moves on and then its decision time. Listening to the judges was interesting.  Jann Arden seemed to want OPP to win. Laurie Ann wanted Cabin Pressure to win.  This left Vanilla Ice as the tie breaker. 

What they didn't show, was that Vanilla Ice read a letter to everyone stating something about how important our emergency service folks are.  I don't remember the details, but I remember it as touching.

So, Cabin Pressure won. Everyone knows this now, but at the moment, only few people present at this premiere knew that. When it was announced, I remember crying (did I even stop?) and hugging my team mates. It was like, winning all over again. Does that make sense? Everyone was cheering. Then the icing on the cake is revealed, WestJet donated $10, 000 to OPP's charity, Dave Mounsey Foundation.  Put all this together, wow. We won, and so did both charities. 

We had Jesse's daughter Avery join us on stage and we presented the cheque of $25,000 to the Alberta Children's Hospital. I was still crying as Avery handed the cheque over. It seemed so right to have her hand the cheque, as she was such a huge part of our courage to do our best.

By 8pm, I was finally having dinner and I felt completely exhausted. I could barely eat. I got home and was so drained. I felt so sick to my stomach. I think it as nerves.

I woke Wednesday morning and the feeling of drained and no sleep from my tummy issues. I showered hoping I would feel better, but got out of the shower and felt horrible. I called in sick to work and went back to bed. I thought I had food poisoning.   As time progressed, I realized that I wasn't sick sick, but emotionally sick and it manifested itself into physical symptoms. By mid day I was sure I was going to vomit any second.

I believe I was like the bride the day after the wedding. All that hard work, dress rehearsals, the big show, and now...NOTHING.  I felt a loss. I couldn't explain it. I kept telling myself how awesome it would be at work today, after everyone had seen the episode, all the accolades.  But that just overwhelmed me and made me even sicker.  At the time, I had no idea what was going on, I just thought I was sick from dinner the night before.  I was shrouded in sadness for the next two days, with physical symptoms.  When I went to work on Thursday, I got so many "Congrats! You guys were great";  I felt great.   But then as the day went on, I was like "Nobody cares anymore" For me, it was a life altering moment I will never forget.  For others, it was a TV show their friend was on, and now its over....NEXT!!  I get that too, as that is what it is...

I noticed even over the weekend, I was still sad.

Today, Wednesday May 23rd, I feel much better. I was able to watch another episode of Canada Sings last night and just enjoy it.  But the back of my mind today is "How are they? Are they OK?"  I will probably do that every week until it is over.

It is now over. I have made some great memories, learned a lot about myself and made new friends. I have bonds with my teammates and I am proud to call them my friends. 

Most importantly, I would do it all over again.

The end. 

Unless you want to watch the episode...?

p.s. you have to be Canadian.

Canada Sings Season 2 - WestJet vs OPP

Normal is OK...I guess.

I have been home for a week from my Canada Sings Adventure.  There are some things I am struggling with since coming home:

• I can't get our song out of my head. Seriously. I am driving my husband MAD! Even if I just snap my fingers...he knows what is going on in my head.  I sing it at work with audience members and team mates.  I even got an email from an audience member with lyrics. ENOUGH ALREADY! 

• The big secret of who won. I tell everyone that both teams had no regrets, and charity won. (true story)

• My face is oily and I am missing my make-up lady that dabs it away, Susanne, where are you? I am sorry I talked in a British accent, I didn't know you were British!

• The team member withdrawals. I had no idea that this was coming. Our team comprised of people from different departments, and I don't get to see them everyday.  I wish I could hang out with them every week, for about 2.5 to 3 hours.

• I have no running shoes. I left them in the hotel. They did not find them. 

Other than that, things have been great!  Kids are on March Break, and sadly, *cough*notreally*cough*, I am working thru their break. Oh darn.  

Andrew is off to Houston this Friday. He's never been there. Its a quick business trip, he won't be gone long enough for me to miss him. Wish I could go...but oh darn...I am working.

I got my passport renewed! Finally that feeling of "trapped" will be gone! Yay!  Which is good, since Barenaked Ladies will be touring this summer :)

I had a fantastic birthday on March 23.  Andrew hung up my Twilight posters!!  Made me so happy to see them.  I don't want to take them down. EVER.  Only thing missing is a full sized Edward Cullen cardboard cut out. Anways!  Andrew invited over my besties Michelle and Stacy, you know they're besties when they give you gifts. Michelle bought me the prettiest scarf while she was at Disney.  Stacy bought me a Twilight game and this really cool vampire card game. I can't wait to play it, it shall be a drinking game.

I saw the Hunger Games and loved it.  Suzanne Collins said that it was an adaptation of the book, and to consider it a separate entity, and I did. I really did enjoy it.

Only 232 days until the last Twilight film, Breaking Dawn Part 2 is out.  Here is a teaser trailer!

Now, my brain is mush after a long day and watching that teaser!  Much love all :)

I had the time of my LIFE!!!

HOW IT CAME TO BE....

One day, my friend Nicole said to me, "I just found out that they're casting for Canada Sings Season 2 and it closes in 2 days, and I want to put a WestJet Team together" She contacted our Business Advisor Colleen, who by the way has always performed and runs the Calgary Stampede Talent Show, and she was like "Yeah, lets do it!".  Well, I am sure it was more professional than YEAH, but you get the gist.

2 days. That was not a lot of time to gather a group, learn our harmonies, pick a song, learn that song, pick a charity, pick a team name, make an audition tape, and mail it in. 2 days, or pass up the opportunity and hope there was a Season 3 of Canada Sings.  Colleen and Nicole decided to go for it.  How many? They didn't know. The strategy was to gather as many people as they could and see if they could make magic happen.

Magic happened folks.

Who did Colleen know that loves to sing? Well, she knew of a few professional singers from her inflight and Stampede days.  She contacted Monica, Stephanie, Lianne, Dan and Suzanne from inflight.  In the back office, she knew Liz, Laura, Dean and Jennie.

Who did Nicole know that loves to sing? Well, she knew that Yolanda and Pam were professional singers.  That was it.  She knew a year ago I tried to start a glee club with Michelle called Cabin Pressure, so she asked us.  We were excited!  We were happy to see Cabin Pressure alive again, Michelle had come with that fantastic name.  She needed some guys, so she asked Dwayne, Brian and Shane to join us.  Jesse heard about it from me, and asked to join.  She emailed Nicole, and was told yes.

19 people.

Sadly, Michelle couldn't leave her post in the Command Center, and never got to join the new and improved Cabin Pressure.

18 people.  We went into one of the training rooms and did introductions. Jesse and I kept looking at each other as we learned how amazing and talented most of our members were, and wondering "do we belong?"

From there we discussed the possible charities and agreed that we would choose the Alberta Children's Hospital, after hearing an emotional story from Jesse.  Next, we tried to agree on a song. It was tough. We had limited choices to pick from and none of them felt right. We would like it, but then someone talented like Yolanda would point out that acapella style wouldn't sound good. We needed to sound good.  Jennie and Dean pointed out a country version of "Born this way" by Lady Gaga.  We agreed that would be better.

So we set out to sing "Born this way". I was blown away by the talent I heard. WOW!  They asked me if I was an alto or soprano. I had no clue.   I didn't know what an alto was!  They asked me what note or key I was in. I was like "what?".  Again, Jesse and I kept looking at each other with wide eyes.

In a matter of 3 hours, we had met, picked a song, picked a charity, learned the song, harmonized, and recorded the audition. It was mailed in to Canada Sings on time.

Then we waited.

The production team from Insight Productions who produces Canada Sings, came out to meet us in November.  They liked what they saw, but wanted to know more before they made their decision.  We did interviews, performed our song, had a dance off, and then solo's.  It was stressful and exciting.


WE MADE IT!

Just before Christmas, we learned we had been chosen to perform on Season 2 of Canada Sings!!  Holy crap.

Our producer Maureen came out to meet us and get a feel for who she would want featured for story lines.  We had a fun time with her, and we got our measurements taken for costumes.

In January, we were told that we would have our bootcamp week on Feb 20th.  Bootcamp was when we would meet our mentors.  We would either have vocalist and choreographer team Sharron and Christian or the team of Scott and Kelly.  They would come to us with a performance planned out and teach it to us in 5 days.

Bootcamp was awesome. Scott taught me I was an alto, but not just an alto, a high alto. It was a week of doubts, no confidence and tears. Then slowly came the triumphs. But then more frustrations.  The best part of it all tho?  The bonds. The friendships formed.  I have a whole bunch of new friends, and our mentors too.

We saw the competition, the OPP.  They were a smaller group and doing a performance that tied directly into their charity. I was freaked out.  We moved on and got more motivated.  We had our struggles and we had our triumphs.  In the end, it was a big tear fest as we said goodbye to our mentors and promised them we would practice.

Practice we did! We did rehearsal's 2 to 3 times a week for 3 hours at a time at the end of our work days.  We would record our rehearsal's and send them to Kelly and Scott, and they would email back praise and criticism.  Then we would fix what they asked us to fix.  We did this for 3 weeks.   We were lucky to have Colleen, she has performed for years and managed performances as well.  She knew exactly how to keep us focused, help us, direct us and praise us.  By our last rehearsal, we were just nitpicking at our performance. Clap bigger, move those arms, smile!  We had our performance and vocals down.  That last rehearsal was on a Thursday, we said our goodbyes at the end and said "See you on Sunday, in Toronto".

OFF TO YYZ...

I was on the first flight departing at 7am, half of us were. The other half on the 8:30am departure on March 19th.  I was tired, but couldn't sleep. We were an excited bunch.  We landed and headed off to the folks holding signs that read "Canada Sings".  We got on a shuttle and headed to our hotel.  Check in took forever and we were late for where we needed to be.  We had a guy named Steve trying to keep us on schedule.

First stop was wardrobe for a fitting. That took some time, and by the time we were done, the other plane had arrived.  We did a group recording of our song in a recording studio that was two doors down from Vanilla Ice's dressing room.  After that we were able to go eat and relax in our room for a bit while plane 2 folks did their wardrobe fitting. Afterwards, we were to dress up and go to a photo shoot.

I was tired and very hot and hungry.  I got to my room and died.  I ran a bath to cool me down. I was about to get in when I got called back to Wardrobe as they needed me again.  I got dressed and ran to the theater (it was connected via a convention center to my hotel).  I got there and realized I left a part of my undergarment in my room. But I was woozy and feeling ill.  So Nicole went to my room and got it, she came back and dropped it off at Wardrobe.   As I waited and worked with Wardrobe, Steve advised me I had no time to rest and eat, and I needed to run to my room and get my photo shoot outfit and make up.  I texted Nicole and told her to meet me in hotel lobby as she had my room key.  I got to the lobby and she calls me and tells me that its in the bag she had Shane drop off at wardrobe. I had to run back to the theater.  I almost fainted. I was so exhausted and needed to eat. I got my key, went back to hotel. I threw up at that point. I ran a bath, and cooled down.  I got a call from wardrobe that they were looking for me. I didn't get a chance to do my hair or make up. I grabbed my photo shoot clothes and ran! When I got to wardrobe, they knew something was wrong. They gave me juice, a sandwich, water and a fan to cool me down.  Apparently the producers didn't like my costume and wardrobe had to ramp it up.

It was time to go to photo shoot and my hair was horrible. A girl named Alex in wardrobe french braided my bangs, and did a cute side pony and put a flower in my hair. Thank goodness.  Nicole did my make up on the shuttle bus to the studio.  I was starving on that drive over but was in good company.

PHOTO SHOOT

We went into this building and lined up against a wall, two guys would come over and check you out and designate you to a room depending on what you needed.  One room was just for powder, the other was for everything. I was nervous when they approached me. So hipster they were.  They looked at my hair, stared at my face and then said "EVERYTHING". Embarrassing!  I went into the room and when called, the hair guy, Jukka said "I love your hair, its perfect, I am just gonna smooth out the sides".  Well, that was OK!  Then I was called for makeup, Susanne redid all my make up.  There was food while we waited, but I didn't want to ruin my lipstick!

The photo shoot itself was a blast. I so love my Cabin Pressure teammates! It was over so fast :(  Back in our shuttle and to the hotel we went.  When I got back, my parents and my sisters had arrived. We all went out for dinner at 10:30pm, had a good laugh and meal.  I was in bed by 11:30pm. I passed out talking to Sandra.

PERFORMANCE DAY....

Woke up at 7am.  My parents got me Timmies.  I tried to eat my bagel, but I just gagged and threw it out.  My coffee, I cherished.  Jesse slept in, and met us with no shower and no coffee. I shared my coffee with her.

We were taken to the stage we would perform on and was reunited with Kelly.  We ran through our perfomance a couple of times and little things got adjusted.  We got mic'd and sang.  It was soooo cool! Scott and Kelly kept yelling "BIGGER!"  We just weren't being showey enough.  BIGGER!!!!

We then had to go back into the studio and do individual recordings.  Before I could get to mine, I was taken into hair and make up first. I didn't get into the recording studio as we sent off to do another rehearsal with hair and make up done.

Back to wardrobe I went, after 3 run through on stage, then putting on a body shaper undergarment, I got overheated again.  More water and a fan.  Wardrobe treated me so well!  Then onstage to do a full dress rehearsal with the set, the mics, the hair/makeup and costume. More adjustments made. Again, we were told to go BIGGER! After full dress rehearsal, I was back in the studio to do my recording.  That was scary and fun!

We finally broke for dinner, we had to put ponchos over our clothes while we ate so we didn't get our costumes dirty. We looked redonk.  We met the other team as we all waited for final final wardrobe fittings.  The OPP team were so awesome and good looking, especially in their WestJet colours!

We were led backstage. We were a nervous bunch.  I talked to Jann Arden and Vanilla Ice..I guess it was more like a rambling.

Not much more I can say about what comes next, but it was amazing.  We left it all on the stage and put out our best performance.

Win or lose, we had no regrets.

It was more like a "nope" talk.

I read over the material I was given. I pulled out the workbook for Quinn and began.  


I gave him a sheet that explained the male genitals terminology. Like, penis, scrotum, anus, etc... He looked at me and said "I know this already".  OK, moving on...


"Quinn, what are some slang words for penis?"
I don't know.  Hilary in the background "dick, twig, cock, one eyed monster..." Quinn says "That's inappropriate"


"What about slang words for the vagina?"
I don't know.  Hilary in the background "vag, vajayjay, box..."  Quinn says "That's inappropriate"


"Slang words for breasts?"
I don't know.  Hilary in the background "tits, jugs, ta ta's..."  Quinn says "Stop it!"


"Slang for anus?"
I am done.


Moving on...Hygiene.  Now this topic he was into.  It went well.  Except for the facial hair part. He wants none. He also enjoyed talking about a healthy diet.  We had to fill in some unhealthy items and he wrote:


candy, chips, pop, alcohol and blood.


Uhm. K.


Then came the fun talk about erect penis's, wet dreams and masturbation. But I was committed to discussing it and it went rather well as I discussed that and how his body is changing.  then came the follow questions and responses.


What are some of the things that you have noticed changing in your body?
Nothing.


Something you are worried about?
Nothing.


Somethings you are excited for?
Nothing.


Then I asked:


Do you ever get an erection?
I don't know.


Have you had a wet dream?
I don't know.


Have you ever masturbated?
I don't know.


OK then, then I guess we will move onto Sex and Sexuality. He says "No, not today".


To be continued I guess.


In other news, that friend Bob of his who asked Hilary for sex and we had to drive home...remember him?    Well Quinn told me yesterday that he is no longer friends with him. I asked him why and he said  "He gets into too much trouble and gets sent home a lot. I don't want friends like that"  That was from DAY ONE in Social Skills. Identifying good and bad friends and how to keep or end their friendships!  So proud of my Aspie!

Teaching my Aspie about Sexuality

If you remember a couple of blog posts ago about Quinn's friend asking Hilary for sex, I mentioned that Quinn just didn't get the severity of that situation? We have tried to talk to him about sex and the human body but he won't have it!  Refused to learn about it in school too.

Well, we shared that story with Trish from Scope Children (our in home counselling service) and she assured us that him not wanting to even think about sex was normal. I mean, afterall, he is only 11 years old but he is also in Jr High.

Trish advised us that because he is in Aspie, we need to be in front of his changes rather than coming from behind.  She has provided us with lots of handouts to discuss Puberty and Sex.  By next week, we are to have read it, agreed on a presentation and figured out who is presenting it.  Our favorite sheet is on Masturbation, Quinn must look at the pictures of places such as, mall, school, library, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom, etc. and figure out where it is appropriate to masturbate.  The worry is that, he will figure out masturbation and love it, and want to do it all the time, just like any other boy. However, due to his lack of social skills, he will think about how good it feels and potentially do it whenever he feels like it. Normally, boys are embarassed about that and will hide it.  We are to create "Penis time" for him.  This will be a time of day and place where he can go and play with his penis. Penis time.  Yup.

Currently, my son says "Talking about sex and my penis is inappropriate", so this should be fun.  No kids want to talk about this stuff with their parents, I get that. But he is at a whole other level.  Currently, he has no interest in girls, or boys.

He was asked to dance at his Halloween Dance at school by 3 girls, said no to them all.  Mind you, he said he was worried he would injure his knee, which meant he would have to dance at half of his capabilities. If he danced half of what he was capable of, that would bring him down to Amateur Rank dancer.  Apparently, his full effort has him at Pro/Epic rate.  His mind must be a wonderful place! Cos when he dances, he just looks like he is jumping and running around, spinning on the floor!

I will let you know how the sex talk goes!

Peeling back the layers

This is a Quinn blog today, again.  Expect them for a bit as we are going through something really big here at my household.  With the approval from FSCD, we were given in home counselling by the Scope Children Society.  They're to help us learn how to parent a child with special needs.  Things are going fantastic and our counseller Trish is amazing. We love her.  She is so easy to work with and comes to us with so much experience, and she gets that we are clueless.

Chewlery!

She asked us to think about behaviours we would like to change in Quinn.  My first thought was, "He is so well behaved. He's happy, positive, kind, generous, and effortless!  What is there to change?" She told me to think about it, and observe him a bit closer with that thought in mind.  The first thing I wrote down was "putting things in his mouth".  EVERYTHING goes in his mouth. His cell phone, remotes, toys, paper, wrappers, fingers, clothes, etc.  Drives me nuts!!  So, I shared that with her.  She asked about his favourite foods, not following, I was like "carrots, celery, steak, and cucumbers".  She nodded yes and said "Sounds like he might have Oral Sensory".    Andrew and I stared at eachother with a "huh?" look.  She explained that he likes foods that he crunch or he has to work hard at eating, puts things in his mouth, anything.  She asked us "Does he concentrate more when he has stuff in his mouth? When is he putting stuff in his mouth?" I told her mostly when playing on his laptop or watching tv.  She said he does that to focus and concentrate, that he needs that sensation of something in his mouth.  Andrew and I had that "ah ha" moment. It all made sense! She offered him a piece of Chewlery.  As seen in the pic here, its a necklace he can chew on and wear.  The first two days he wore it, he barely ate (over eating is a problem with him, eating every 30 mins)!   She also recommended that we buy fishtank tubing (those plastic tubes used on filters in a fish tank) to put at the end of his pencils so he has that to chew on at school!  She is a genius!


Please note, altho that was a huge eye opening experience, as we peel back the layers to learn about our son and his Aspergers, its a very emotional journey.  I actually cried upon learning he has an Oral Sensory issue.  One more thing to add to the list I guess.  See? I am getting a list. Do you think I want a list?


Today, I made a status update on Facebook that I got from my friend Kate.  It read:


Tonight a lot of creatures will visit your door. Be open minded. The child who is grabbing more than one piece of candy might have poor fine motor skills. The child who takes forever to pick out one piece of candy might have motor planning issues. The child who does not say trick or treat or thank you might be shy or non-verbal. The child who looks disappointed when he sees your bowl might have anallergy. The child who isn't wearing a costume at all might have SPD or autism. Be nice. Be patient. Its everyone's Halloween. Make a mom feel good by making a big deal of her special child.

*Copied from a friend's post...repost if you'd like. People can never understand it if they haven't been through it.


I posted it on my Facebook status, and then cried. I had that moment of WHY do I have to say things like this? Why do I have to tell the world this, to make his life easier? It was one of those mommy breakdown moments.


The breakdown then occurred on my car ride home as once again, I was overcome with my personal pity party.


Quinn had a fantastic Halloween. He has been some kind/colour of a Ninja for 5 years.  This year, was different tho. This year he was Camouflage guy. Not sure what that was but I supported it! Also, his first time letting his face be painted.  He doesn't like stuff on his face, so this was also a big thing!


Proud of him!


We have an appointment with Trish tomorrow. I am already nervous to peel off the next layer of Aspergers.